On my way into work this morning, I walked by two….um….rather interesting guys:
Guy #1 was wearing a pair of skinny jeans that looked like they had been painted on. While he was not fat by any means, he was also not what anybody would describe as skinny.
Guy #2 was walking a tiny little foo-foo dog*. I’m not really sure what the guy was wearing, as I could not get past the little pink flower in the dog’s hair. It looked like one of the flower barrettes I used when my daughter was still in diapers.
*I debated way too long on the appropriate adjective to describe the dog. I considered “ankle biter”, “Stickless Swiffer Duster”, and my wife’s preferred “kick in the face” dog, before settling on foo-foo. I’m not sure what breed it was, but rest assured, it was definitely NOT a pit bull, lab, or even a beagle.
The sight of these two fellows – both looking less than manly* – prompted a question: If I had to be one of the two guys, walking around in public, which one would I be?
*I’ll be the first to admit that I am far from a macho manly man – and my wife would probably be a close second. Name a “manly” pursuit, such as hunting, working on cars, handyman projects, or the like and the odds are good that I’d rather play with my kids, watch something on Food Network, or go shopping. I’ll proudly own that. But for me, the line is drawn at skinny jeans or flowers in the dog’s hair.
So what would I pick?
I’d rather take Fifi for a walk with a hot pink flower in her hair. There is a decent chance that I could deflect the blame/shame onto somebody else for being stuck walking Princess Von Fluffington. But if you’re wearing skinny jeans, there are very few “Get Out Of Jail Free” cards that you could legitimately play.
Feit Can Write 