As the name implies, Thanksgiving is a time to reflect upon all of the good things in your life and be grateful for what you have.
But what if you are a football team playing in what is widely believed to be the worst Power 5 conference in the country? What does a team like Indiana, Michigan, or Nebraska have to be thankful for in 2014?
Glad you asked. I believe that everybody should be able to give thanks for something – even if you sometimes have to dig a little to find anything worthy of your gratitude.
What do the schools of the Big Ten have to be thankful for this football season? Plenty:
- Illinois: Remember that time you dressed up like a team that didn’t look like Illinois? And then you played like a team that didn’t look like Illinois? That was pretty cool.
“Wee! Nobody knows that we suck!” (photo credit: news-gazette.com)
- Indiana: You may bewinless in conference play, but you still hold the league’s best non-conference win (at SEC East leading Missouri)
Dear ESPN, Kindly put this in your SEC bias and smoke it.
- Iowa: Forbes says you can now afford to fire Kirk Ferentz!
My Iowa-born Mom is starting to regret her tattoo. (photo credit: cbssports.com)
- Maryland: Jim Delany’s check of bailout money did not bounce. Now you can buy more hideously ugly uniforms to demonstrate the pride you have in your state!
Maryland, we wear these to honor you. (photo credit: lostlettermen.com)
- Michigan: After failing with Rich Rod and BradyHoke, surely the third time will be the charm, right? Right?
Troll so hard (image courtesy elevenwarriors.com)
- Michigan State: The continued employment of BradyHoke is more than enough for Spartan fans.
If I were a Spartan, this would be my PC background. Kudos to car-memes.com for this one.
- Minnesota: Your coaching staff eats ice cream bars on the sideline of a frigid, snowy game without giving a single ____ what you think.
“I wanted a Blizzard, not a damn Dilly Bar” (photo credit: athlonsports.com)
- Nebraska: You never have to face Melvin Gordon again. And depending on if you are aBo-leaver or aBo-liever, you may be thankful forPelini’s jobstatus as of this weekend.
“I’m sorry I got you fired, Angry Coach” (photo credit: AP)
- Northwestern: Nobody really has very high expectations for you, so it’s tough to ever have a “down” year. Plus, Chick-fil-A for everyone!
Nice touch with the Wildcat purple suit, KD (image credit dailycaller.com)
- Ohio State: The odds are good that Urban Meyer won’t have to shame eat an entire Papa John’s pizza after this year’s Big Ten Championship.
“No garlic butter?!? Why does everything bad happen to me??” (photo credit: USA Today)
- Penn State: Despite the best efforts of the NCAA and Big Ten refs to screw you over, you can now go to a crappy bowl game (where refs from another conference will probably try to screw you over).
B1G refs be like “Meh, close enough”. (image credit: @Pauly_G220)
- Purdue: Be very, very thankful that this guy went to Indiana instead of Purdue. Plus – you still have that really big drum, which is kinda neat in a totally Purdue sort of way.
The bigger the drum, the bigger the punchline (photo credit: purdue.edu)
- Rutgers: Instead of getting beat by Houston,Cincy,UCF,andUConn, you now get blown out by Michigan State, Ohio State, Wisconsin, and Nebraska! Welcome to theB1G time!
If you want to be taken seriously when joining a prestigious academic conference, don’t treat your promotional copy like a 2 am text message (image credit: collegiatestadiums.com)
- Wisconsin: For the next 300+ days, nobody can take away your FREEDOM!!! – even if they wanted that generic, ugly ass trophy.
It’s never good when you need five guys to lift the trophy (photo credit: news.wisc.edu)
- And a bonus for the B1G Boss Man himself, Jim Delany: Adding Maryland and Rutgers has TOTALLY made the conference stronger and more exciting. The reputation of the conference is an all time high.
Wait? That’s NOT Jim Delany? The eyebrows always fool me (image credit: muppet.wikia.com)